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his girl friday.

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it's nandra. they also call her nashz, the history of such name is way too long to elaborate in this little space. she's seventeen. she's a she. she lives a typical metropolitan lifestyle in the capital of Indonesia. she's currently in her senior year of high school, enduring the second and last year of IB Diploma Programme that's totally ruining her life slowly. but she thinks the whole suffering would give her some sort of advantage in the (scarily) near future. she's a CISVer and lovin' every bit of it. oh, she also very much enjoys mango juice, she'd even prefer it than OJ haha. and while we're at it, yes, she might be random from time to time. she wishes you'd be quite patient about it. :)

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© nandra 2009
tutorials from [link]
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Friday, October 02, 2009 // 5:07 PM

I'm in love with you.

I want you to know and I plan to tell you. I hope you will love me back someday, the way I love you now. I hope this doesn’t destroy the connection and friendship that we have. I hope this leads to more, it could be beautiful you know? If we just gave it a shot.

from: [link]

I never had the guts to ask you to give it a shot. Besides, what chance do I have? You were heels over head and you won't let go. I'd like to put the whole thing behind me now, if that's okay. I like what we have now. But it's human to want something more that what we have. You meant a lot to me. More than you've ever known. I'm just too much of a coward to say it out loud.
I don't know if this is regret. It sounds stupid now that I went through those words above again. I'll try to be content with what I have now. I know it's not as bad. I should really try to be content with myself, no? Life is not all rainbows and unicorns, but there's the equivalent somewhere.
If you think I'll move on and forget what I ever felt about you, well, you're wrong. I'll move on, one way or the other, but I'll never forget. It's too awesome to be forgotten.
You were one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Because without you I'll never found trust. I'd always think it's non-existent. But, now I don't, because you showed it to me.
Well, enough ramblings. It's not like you'll read it anyways.
So, I'll end it here.
See, you.

Oh, btw. I miss you so much.
Come back soon :)

PS: the above is basically free writing. but it's how i feel at times, i guess. i should make more original posts. whatever that is. oh well. back to reality. i have hundreds of words to cut out from my world lit essay. holidays are ending soon. shucks.

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