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his girl friday.

polaroid,poladroid,beach

it's nandra. they also call her nashz, the history of such name is way too long to elaborate in this little space. she's seventeen. she's a she. she lives a typical metropolitan lifestyle in the capital of Indonesia. she's currently in her senior year of high school, enduring the second and last year of IB Diploma Programme that's totally ruining her life slowly. but she thinks the whole suffering would give her some sort of advantage in the (scarily) near future. she's a CISVer and lovin' every bit of it. oh, she also very much enjoys mango juice, she'd even prefer it than OJ haha. and while we're at it, yes, she might be random from time to time. she wishes you'd be quite patient about it. :)

♥
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Ohhh, wow....
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thankyous.

© nandra 2009
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Monday, February 09, 2009 // 10:04 PM
can't think of a title right now. srry.

omg i can't believe i havent said anything about my birthday in this blog. wow. oh well i'm gonna start now. :p

sooo on the day of my bday, i got a very very pleasant surprise from my friends. they brought cake, in which filza's mom, filza, diga and ariani made. though i'm pretty sure filza, diga and ariani only crackd eggs or something hahaha. just kidding. ;) but really, the cake was amazing! i had three slices myself! hahaha.

it was really nicee. they took me to an empty class and we (me and gino, he had his 17th a few weeks before me) blew the candle and take pics and eat lots and lots of cake.
ohh and opened presents too! woo hoo!
man i love presents. and it was really nice too! i got two dresses and a pocket comb haha. more details and pics on that later guys. my internet's being a bitch. ;p

then on the 7th was the dinner. with a few of my cisv friends, whom i missed so damn much coz we havent met for a long long time. i think last time we met was... november 08? wow. after the dinner we went down to loewy and had a bit of a drink. then i went home with the headache the size of an iceberg haha. ok slightly hyperbolic it wasnt THAT bad. but yeah, it's still a headache haha.

well i'm sorry i'm not so descriptive or anything in writing this post. lately i've been coping with just so many things unexplainable. sometimes i get down for no apparent reason. but i could shift to being hyper, though i think it's just me denying everything, enshrouding the cracks under broken laughters and hyper acts.

though i didn't think these things have been heaving me so much until today that i finally decided to share it with someone. it was actually really reluctant to say a word about the things that's been bothering me. i felt like annabel greene in sarah dessen's just listen. like, her i can't speak up about my troubles and i don't do confrontations very well. in fact i'm very much bad at it. hmmm.

anyways, i didn't realize that it's actually been heaving me down so much until today when i broke down and cried when i talked to someone. it was hard getting the truth out and just say it blatantly.
but afterwards i felt that a weight has been lifted from me. i really don't mind that the tears streamed like crazy, coz holding it in for way too long just has been excruciating.

another day, another lesson.
i'm glad i did what i did today. i realized that i must be more mature now. and handling things like this and confrontations is a way of reaching maturity, no? life can turn into a bitch from a beach with just one snap of a finger and a single sentence. and worst, it'll get you when you're off guard.

it's hard. i know.
but i gotta cope.
somehow.

gnite, guys.
sorry for the suddenly gloomy post. :s

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